When you think about your inner critic, what do you feel? That persistent voice in your mind that scrutinizes your every action, making you doubt yourself and feel inadequate. It’s the voice that tells you you're never enough and urges you to abandon your dreams. Does it evoke anger, frustration, or sadness?

What if, instead of trying to silence your inner critic, you tried to befriend it?

The Journey to Befriend Your Inner Critic

Befriending your inner critic is a transformative process. It requires compassion and curiosity to explore its motivations, understand its role, and ultimately accept it as part of who you are. It involves listening without fear and seeking hidden messages behind its harsh judgments.

Why Befriend Your Inner Critic?

You might resent or even despise that inner voice, wishing it would disappear. Constantly battling it can lead to stress, anxiety, and diminished self-esteem. This struggle consumes your energy, leaving you tense and frustrated.

In psychotherapy sessions in Lisbon, we explore the benefits of making peace with your inner critic. Embracing this voice as one part of your multifaceted self can lead to relaxation and acceptance. Understanding your inner critic helps you uncover your fears and insecurities, boosting your self-awareness and confidence. With increased resilience, you can ask your inner critic to step back from its protective role.

Steps to Make Friends with Your Inner Critic

Here are 5 steps to start befriending your inner critic:

1. Identify Your Inner Critic

Notice when this critical voice surfaces. In what situations does it become louder? What does it sound like? Does it resemble someone from your life, like a family member or friend? What messages does it convey?

2. Acknowledge Your Inner Critic

Ignoring the voice often makes it louder. Acknowledge its presence by saying, "Okay, I hear you, inner critic." This reduces tension and validates the critic as one part of you.

3. Be Curious and Listen

Instead of tensing up or getting angry, take time to listen. Stay open-minded, suspend judgment, and observe the thoughts that arise.

4. Ask Questions

What does your inner critic need? What is it afraid of? Is it trying to protect you from something? Understanding its concerns can help you see beyond the surface comments and develop compassion for it.

5. Set Boundaries

Accepting your inner critic doesn’t mean giving it more power. Let it know that you appreciate its intentions, but you are in charge and no longer need its protection.

Embrace All Parts of Yourself

Accepting every part of you, even those you don’t like, can be challenging. It requires time, effort, and self-compassion. However, with dedication, it is possible and can lead to a transformative experience.

Seek Professional Help in Lisbon

Ready to start this journey? If you need professional support, schedule a free initial Zoom call with Alicja, a qualified psychotherapist in Lisbon, to help guide you through befriending your inner critic.

By engaging in psychotherapy in-person in Lisbon or online from the comfort of your home, you can embark on a path towards greater self-acceptance and inner peace.

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*The information provided in this blog post is for general educational and informational purposes only and should not be construed as medical or mental health professional advice. If you are struggling with any of the issues described in this post, please seek appropriate personalised help from a qualified mental health professional.

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Sources:

Developing a Compassionate Relationship with Your Inner Critic: A Mindfulness-Based Approach by T. Brach

The Role of the Inner Critic in Shame and Self-Criticism by K. C. Tillman and M. A. Teasdale

The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion: Freeing Yourself from Negative Thoughts and Embracing Kindness by K. Neff

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